Tonight with your 5 to 8 year old
The prompt
“When a friend gets something new and you don't have one, what does that feeling in your chest feel like?”
What to listen for
If they can name the feeling and describe it physically (tight chest, hot face, wanting to look away), that's a strong sign they're building real self-awareness, praise that noticing, not the feeling itself. If they immediately jump to "I want one too," that's completely typical; the goal isn't to shame the wanting, just to help them notice it.
If they say they feel happy for their friend with no hard feelings at all, that's wonderful, but also gently check it's true and not just the answer they think you want, some kids perform positivity because they think jealousy isn't allowed.
If they say "I don't know," ask about a specific recent moment rather than the feeling in the abstract.
What this tells you
How honestly they can sit with jealousy shows whether they feel safe having a messy feeling in front of you without being judged for it.