Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old
The prompt
“How has the way you feel about making mistakes changed as you've gotten older?”
What to listen for
If they describe feeling less crushed by mistakes than they used to, or seeing them as useful information rather than proof they're bad at something, that's a strong sign of a healthier, more resilient relationship with themselves.
If they say mistakes still feel just as hard, that's worth taking seriously and gently, you can ask what makes them feel worse, a fear of disappointing someone or just their own inner voice, without turning it into advice-giving.
Either way, this is a good moment to just affirm that you see them as someone who's allowed to be a work in progress.
What this tells you
How their relationship with mistakes has evolved shows how much self-acceptance they're building as they mature.