Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old

The prompt

“Is there a gap between how you want people to see you and how you think they actually do?”

What to listen for

An honest, reflective answer shows real self-awareness, and naming a gap isn't a bad sign, it means they're thinking critically about their own image rather than assuming everyone already sees them clearly.

If the gap sounds painful, like feeling misunderstood in a specific way, take that seriously and gently, that's a vulnerable thing to admit, and it deserves to be met with curiosity, not reassurance that rushes past it.

If they say there's no gap, that's a great sign of feeling accurately seen by the people around them, worth affirming warmly.

What this tells you

The gap between how they want to be seen and how they think they're seen shows how much they currently feel truly understood by the people around them.