Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old
The prompt
“How can you tell when someone actually wants to hear from you versus just being polite about it?”
What to listen for
If they describe specific signals, quick replies, follow-up questions, remembering details, they've been paying close attention to who truly shows up for them; they need to know that radar is trustworthy.
If they mention feeling unsure or like they're often the one reaching out more, that vulnerability deserves gentleness, not reassurance that rushes past it, they need to feel that uncertainty is normal, not something wrong with them.
A vague answer might mean they haven't put words to it yet, that's fine, the question can just live in the back of their mind.
What this tells you
How they read genuine interest from others shows you how confident they feel that they're worth someone's real attention.