Tonight with your 5 to 8 year old

The prompt

“What's a compliment about me you've been saving up and haven't said yet?”

What to listen for

Whatever they say next is worth writing down somewhere, because kids this age rarely offer unprompted compliments to adults, the fact that they have one "saved up" means they've been noticing you more than you realized. Notice what kind of compliment it is: about something you do, something you look like, or something about how you make them feel, the last one is the most telling.

If they compliment a feeling ("you make me feel safe," "you're fun to be with"), that's a strong, clear sign of connection and security. If they compliment an action or appearance, that's warm too, just a slightly different flavor of noticing.

If they say "I don't know," ask what they'd tell a friend about you, sometimes it's easier to imagine bragging to someone else first.

What this tells you

The compliment they've been holding onto shows what part of you they've actually been paying attention to lately.