Tonight with your 9 to 12 year old
The prompt
“Has there been a time you felt proud of someone else's success instead of jealous?”
What to listen for
A genuine story here shows real emotional maturity, being able to celebrate someone else without it costing their own sense of worth is a big, valuable skill.
If they admit it was a mix of both proud and a little jealous, that's honest and completely normal, those feelings can coexist, and naming that helps them trust their own complicated feelings more.
If they say they're always jealous of others' success, don't judge it, ask what usually makes that feeling so strong, since it often points to something they wish they had more of themselves.
What this tells you
This shows how secure they currently feel in their own worth when someone else is doing well.