Tonight with your 9 to 12 year old

The prompt

“Was there a time you had to try something you weren't good at yet, in front of other people?”

What to listen for

If they can describe pushing through the discomfort of being a beginner publicly, that's real courage forming, being willing to look unpolished in front of others is a skill that will serve them for life.

If they say they avoid that whenever possible, that's honest and common; ask what specifically makes it feel risky, since the answer usually points to a fear of being judged rather than the activity itself.

If they say "I don't know," bring up a recent class, sport, or activity where they were clearly new at something.

What this tells you

This tells you how safe it feels to them to be seen struggling, which affects how willing they'll be to try new things.