Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old
The prompt
“Has what "success" means to you changed at all as you've gotten older?”
What to listen for
If they can describe a real shift, from something external like grades or approval to something more personal, it means they're developing their own definition instead of just inheriting one.
If their current definition sounds different from what you'd expect or hope for them, try to receive it as their own genuine thinking rather than correcting it toward your version.
If they say it hasn't changed much, that's fine, some values form early and just get reinforced over time rather than shifting dramatically.
What this tells you
This shows you what they're currently measuring their own worth and progress against.