Tonight with your 9 to 12 year old
The prompt
“What's your favorite outdoor game or thing to do outside?”
What to listen for
If they answer with real enthusiasm, that activity is a genuine outlet for their energy and freedom, worth protecting time for regularly.
If they mention doing it mostly with specific people, notice who those people are, it tells you who they associate with feeling free and unrestrained.
If they say they don't really have one, that's useful to know, it might be worth introducing more unstructured outdoor time to see what clicks.
What this tells you
This tells you where they get to feel physically free and unrestrained, which matters as much as any quiet, indoor comfort.