Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old

The prompt

“When we're clearly annoyed with you, how would you rather we handle it?”

What to listen for

If they ask for directness, "just tell me instead of giving me the silent treatment", that's a sign they value honesty over politeness, and that ambiguity actually stresses them out more than a clear conversation would.

If they ask for space first, "let me calm down before you come at me", that tells you they need a beat to self-regulate before they can really hear you, and pushing in too fast will backfire.

If they say "I don't know, just don't yell," take that at face value; it's a reasonable, simple ask, and you don't need to dig further to make it meaningful.

What this tells you

Their answer is basically a guide to how they best receive correction without feeling attacked, which tells you what makes them feel respected even when they've messed up.