FamlyKingdom

Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old

The prompt

“Is there something you're kind of scared of that you don't really talk about much?”

What to listen for

If they open up here, that's a significant act of trust, fears at this age often feel embarrassing to admit, so sharing one means they feel safe enough with you to be less than fearless for a minute. Meet it with calm, not alarm.

If they minimize it right after saying it, that's normal, let them downplay it if they need to, without insisting it's actually a big deal.

If they say they don't have any, or won't go there tonight, don't push, fear is one of the harder things to hand someone, and "I don't know" might really mean "not yet."

What this tells you

Whatever fear surfaces, or doesn't, shows you how safe they currently feel being vulnerable with you instead of having to seem fine all the time.

Tonight you know what to ask. And tomorrow?

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All the feelings questions Conversation Starters for Teenagers