Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old
The prompt
“Have you noticed yourself getting better at fighting fair with people, even when part of you wants to just go for the jugular?”
What to listen for
If they describe holding back or choosing words carefully, they're showing you self-control they've built themselves, they need that effort noticed, not assumed to be automatic.
If they admit they still lose it sometimes, that honesty is a gift, they need to know admitting the hard parts won't cost them your respect.
If they say they don't really think about it, gently note that's worth noticing next time, no pressure, just planting a seed.
What this tells you
How they talk about fighting fair shows how much they trust their own judgment under pressure.