Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old
The prompt
“Is there a change in yourself you're genuinely proud of that took a really long time to happen?”
What to listen for
If they describe slow, hard-won growth, patience, confidence, a habit, a friendship repaired, that pride in a long process deserves to be celebrated fully; they need to know you see the whole arc, not just where they ended up.
If they get a little emotional or reflective describing it, let that be its own moment rather than rushing to the next question, a year's worth of growth deserves a pause.
If they downplay it as "not a big deal," gently push back with genuine admiration, they need to hear from you that slow change is often the most impressive kind.
What this tells you
The slow change they're proud of shows you the story of who they've been quietly becoming all along.