Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old

The prompt

“How different are you online compared to how you are in the room with people?”

What to listen for

If they say there's a real gap, listen without alarm for what kind of gap it is, more confident online, more guarded, funnier, more anxious. Some difference is completely normal; a huge, distressing gap is worth noting gently as something to keep watching.

If they say they're pretty much the same everywhere, that consistency is a good sign of a stable sense of self that doesn't need to shift for different audiences.

If they get cagey about the question, don't push into specifics like which apps or who they talk to, the point here is the general feeling, not surveillance.

What this tells you

This shows you how integrated or fragmented their sense of self feels across different parts of their life right now.