Tonight with your 9 to 12 year old
The prompt
“Was there ever a time being right didn't actually feel as good as you thought it would?”
What to listen for
A thoughtful answer shows real emotional insight, realizing that winning an argument can cost something in a relationship is a mature, valuable lesson to notice out loud.
If they describe feeling guilty or lonely after being right, that's worth sitting with together rather than fixing, it's a genuinely complicated feeling worth taking seriously.
If they say being right always feels good, that's fine too, you might gently share your own example of a time it didn't, to plant the idea for later.
What this tells you
This shows whether they're starting to value relationships over always needing to win.