Tonight with your 9 to 12 year old
The prompt
“Is there a chore you think is unfair compared to what your sibling has to do?”
What to listen for
A specific, reasoned complaint shows they're paying close attention to fairness in the house, that's a normal, healthy radar at this age, not just whining.
If their comparison is really about feeling less trusted or less valued than the sibling rather than the chore itself, that's the real thing to address, ask if it's really about the task or about something else.
If they say it's all fair, take a second to double check they're not just saying what sounds agreeable, ask what they'd change if they were in charge of assigning chores.
What this tells you
This shows you whether your child feels like fairness between siblings is something you actually pay attention to.