Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old
The prompt
“What do you wish I actually got about you wanting your door closed sometimes?”
What to listen for
A teen who can explain this clearly is telling you they need privacy to feel like a whole person, not because they're hiding something, but because having an unwatched space is part of growing up. That's not rejection of you, it's them building a self.
If they get defensive or short, that might mean they've felt judged for wanting space before, and they're bracing for you to argue back. Try not to. If they shut the conversation down fast, let it go, sometimes the closed door itself is the answer, and that's okay.
What you're really listening for is whether they feel like their need for space gets treated as normal in this house, or like something they have to fight for.
What this tells you
How easily they can talk about this shows you whether their need for privacy feels safe to name out loud or like something they've had to defend before.