Tonight with your 13 to 17 year old
The prompt
“What's actually different about who you are now compared to a year ago?”
What to listen for
If they can name something concrete, more confident, less anxious about something, different interests, that self-awareness is a great sign; it means they're actively noticing their own growth rather than just drifting through it.
If they focus on external changes only (taller, different school), gently notice if there's more underneath by staying curious rather than supplying the "real" answer for them.
If they say "nothing's really different," that's okay, sometimes change is easier to see from the outside; you could offer one thing you've noticed, lightly, without turning it into a whole assessment.
What this tells you
This tells you how aware they are of their own growth, and how much they're starting to see themselves as someone who is actively becoming, not just aging.