Tonight with your 9 to 12 year old
The prompt
“Is there a family tradition you hope you keep doing even when you're all grown up?”
What to listen for
Whatever tradition they name is usually less about the activity itself and more about the feeling attached to it, being together, being silly, being taken care of, so ask what they like about it to get to that deeper layer.
If they mention wanting to do it with their own future family someday, that's a strong sign they feel this tradition as something stabilizing and worth carrying forward, a real vote of confidence in your family life.
If they say none really matter to them, don't take it personally, ask instead what they'd want to start as a new tradition, which shows what they wish for instead.
What this tells you
This tells you which parts of family life already feel like home base to them, worth protecting into the future.