Tonight with your 9 to 12 year old

The prompt

“Was there ever a time you chose to comfort someone instead of just ignoring that they were upset?”

What to listen for

If they can name a specific moment, it shows they're developing real emotional instincts, noticing someone else's pain and choosing to act on it rather than looking away.

Listen for whether they felt awkward or natural doing it, awkwardness is completely normal at this age and doesn't mean the instinct wasn't good, just that it's still new.

If they say they usually don't know what to do when someone's upset, that's a great opening to talk through a few simple things that help, without making them feel bad for not knowing already.

What this tells you

This shows how comfortable they're becoming with noticing and responding to other people's feelings.