Tonight with your 9 to 12 year old
The prompt
“How does our family show appreciation for the small things, not just the big wins?”
What to listen for
If they can name specific small gestures, a comment at dinner, a certain look, a high five, that's a sign they're tuned into the quiet ways love shows up, not just the big celebrations.
If they say the family mostly notices big things and not small ones, take that seriously without getting defensive, it's useful information about where they feel their everyday effort goes unseen.
Either way, this is a good moment to ask what small thing they did recently that they wished got noticed.
What this tells you
This shows whether they feel genuinely seen day to day, not just on the days something big happens.